Fucking meds. Ai.
It’s a feeling of agitation/restlessness combined with an inability to concentrate.
The medication is called Abilify but nowhere does it say Abili-not.
Titrating off the 150mg of Effexor and have one more week at 37.5 before I’m done with it for good. Been on the Effexor (and a plethora of other psychotropics) regimen for over 15 years.
Turns out that some anti-depressants (i.e. all of the ‘new’ non MAOIs) make Bi-Polar II worse.
Who knew?
Why tell me though? What’s a 72 hour observation in a locked unit good for if not experimentation. Nothing I tell you.
Besides utter boredom, borderline criminals, completely sideways schizophrenics and other folk of high intelligence and cultural values.
To think that I checked myself in.
Whadda maroon.
I said to the doc after my first 24 hours in that snake pit “So, what am I supposed to do? Discuss Offenbach with drooly over there? Or maybe the condescending idiot nurse wants to organize a round-table on quantum physics and the real reason Tycho Brahe should be given first dibs?”
The doc didn’t laugh but the Intern with him cracked a serious grin. At least I was kept in a private room for the 72 hours. Seems that my intelligence, wit, hygene and education placed me in a somewhat different sphere. Does this mean that all the ‘in’ crazies can afford insurance? I’m that much of an outsider? Whoa. Cool.
Something about suicidal ideations combined with a plan and the means to carry it off would not allow them to release me early, even though i checked myself in.
Made the mistake of telling my plans to a doc at Nevada Mental Health; was only there to fill out paperwork to qualify for low-cost therapy and free meds.
Grrrrr.
Well my concentration is up. Have not written a regular blog for 2 days. The new cocktail is fucking me up.
Abilify, Lamictal, Lithium, Xanax, Levothyroxine, and Dyazide (for the blood pressure).
Do I still have the gift of amusing thoughts? Sure.
Am I less suicidal than a week ago? Yes.
Do I want my Old Life Back? Oh FSM Please!
Party on Garth.
